Kates Blog

So when I was over at Albert’s house earlier today, we made brownies, watched a good ol’ Zombie movie and of course, wrote a How To. I just copied this off his blog, but here’s his version of how do have sex…Take my advice and do not listen to it. Well, at least not past Step 17, people.

1. Set the mood by lighting some candles and incense that makes the room smell like Chinese rain.
2. Invite your woman in and start by slowly taking off her shirt and tell her that you are going to give her a sensual back massage.
3. DO NOT USE OIL!
4. Use this opportunity to lie her down on the bed and un-clip her bra saying “I don’t want it to get in the way…” (Of her boobies!)
5. Then whip off your shirt very quickly, cut it off with a knife if necessary.
6. Proceed to massage her back, look elsewhere for how to do this.
7. Slowly lean down and kiss her on the neck. Her reaction will tell you how horny she is. If she moans deeply, your in.
8. If she doesn’t… well you better take some massage classes and get her a shitload of chocolate.
9. Rub your hands along her sides, softly pressing and gently dragging your fingers after your pressing palms to make her tingle. Reach around in front and unbutton her pants.
10. Slowly, while still massaging her body, pull her pants down gently. Just her pants, not her underwear.
11. Next start to kiss her neck again. Start from the bottom kissing gently and passionately, the time for toe-curling hickey kisses is later. Kiss your way up to her ear and gently lick her in a sensual manor. Don’t start licking her like the family dog does, only use the tip of your tongue.
12. Slowly turn her over and toss her bra off to the side and immediately kiss her on the lips. Don’t go ballistic and shove your tongue down her throat like your trying to get at her dinner.
13. Move your hands up her sides, gently at first and slide them up onto her boobs. Be very gentle but firm at the same time. You want her to know your a man but still can control yourself.
14. Hopefully she will be unbuckling your pants, slide out of them and push them off the bed.
15. Reach down and slowly slider your fingers under the elastic of her underwear. If she doesn’t protest slide them all the way down. If she does… consider that she might be on her period.
16. Wait till she has started to take off your boxers.
17. Flip her over onto her stomach again and grab her by the hips and lift her butt in the air.
18. FUCK HER RAW!

So this is my 86th blog, cool right? Well I got my paycheck I guess today. I got $59.00 or something like that. But today.com e-mailed me and explained how my blog just isn’t good enough to get paid per post anymore, boo hoo! So now I get paid per views. So for every like 1000 views, I get two whole dollars! :pp

Yeah, thats cool, I guess. Well that means I might not be blogging as much, because I don’t get paid per post, but I’m sure I’ll blog every once in awhile just cause.

So, yup, thats about it! :D

So this morning I woke up with a runny nose and a sore throat. Sweet, right? Well anyways, DayQuil does wonders so I’ll be fine, I’m sure. I’m fairly certain I got the cold or whatever it is from my family, though, being as my brother, mom, and dad all had it.
Today I got out of school early, actually. It could have been because I didn’t feel well, but the real reason was that I had forgotten to print out my Economics paper and I didn’t want to be off to a bad start, I guess.

Hmm, what else was exciting about today? I got to see my grades, that was exciting, I guess? I don’t remember what I had exactly, but no C’s, which is good. Just B’s and A’s. Whew. I wonder when I’ll get my report card…Hmm

I guess Tuesdays are alright…Nothing too exciting happened at school, as usual. Class, class, class, break, class, class, lunch, class, class…Home

Today I hung out with Albert and did my homework! So yeah, nothing too exciting about my day. Oh no wait! Albert and I went on a walk which was  kind of cool. We played on a swing and then climbed a mountain. Okay, it was just a hill, but whatever, same thing.Yeah. then we walked down the mountain and played on the swing some more. Good stuff, good stuff. Tomorrow we were thinking we’d make pie and fish sticks, so if that happens, that’ll be fun.

Also, I’ve realized that I get quite tired very easily lately, so I think I’m gonna start going to bed by 12:15am at the latest. And I’ll try the whole sleeping in thing on weekends, if I can…

So I really don’t know what to write about, so, oh, here’s an idea. Today in Pre-Calculus, Danielle and I made a list of things to do when there seems like nothing to do, so here it goes:

1. Ferry to Sausalito
2. Ferry to the Pier
3. Embarcadero
4. Mount Tam hike
5. Stinson Beach
6. Dillon Beach
7. Howarth Park
8. Mall
9. Downtown Petaluma
10. Movies
11. Candy store
12. Dinner
13. Petaluma River
14. San Francisco shopping
15. MOMA
16. Exploratorium
17. Academy of SSixcience
18. Zoo
19. Downtown
20. Ice Skating
21. Walk across the bridge
22. Hill by the bridge
23. Luchessi Park
24. Chucky Cheese
25. Grandma Walker’s Lake
26. Water World
27. Scandia
28. Camping World!
29. Roint Reyes
30. Meer Woods
31. Bake pie and cookies
32. Movie theater ALL day
33. Paintballing
34. SixFlags
35. Bowling
36. Harry Potter marathon

Now if your bored, there are some ideas for ya’ll

So, Saturday was my Winter Formal. I was planning on going or whatever- I even asked Albert in a “cute” way, I guess…(Personalized M&Ms, so yummy) But, then the day came, and I just didn’t feel like going, so, we didn’t. We just went up to Rohnert Park to see Bedtime Stories, which I really liked, actually. It’s the one with Adam Sandler. But yeah, apparently Grace Morton, a girl who graduated from my school last year was an extra in it, which I though was pretty cool, I guess. Anyways, good movie. If you have a little sibling or anything, I suggest you take them to see it, thats what I was going to do, but whatever.

But today, Albert and I went to Dillon Beach, which was fun. We climbed rocks, which was cool, and then oh! I saw tons of starfish and three crabs! So cool! We tried to capture one with Alberts’ knife, but it didn’t work out to well. Then we went up to these rock things and we ate our lunch-dinner, I guess. It was like a picnic! Hella cool! So we had PB&Js, Orange juice, fruit by the food, Oreos and milk, blackberry pie and, I think thats it. We shoulda packed fruit…dangit. And that was fun. And that was the day in a nutshell. (:

hella pix. :pp

I suggust no one read it, it was just my Creative Writing paper, that kind of sucked, to be honest. I had like 2 minutes to post and I had to post something quick to make my dollar for the day! Ha.

But anyways, tonight I have Winter Formal. Oh them school dances, what a blast. I’m sure I’ll blog about it tomorrow, though, so read about it then if you so wish.

Next up, last night, Albert and I watched Death Race. SO good. I am gonna rent or buy Death Race 2000, now. My mom was telling me about Death Race 2000 and how it was different, and it sounded really cool, so I’ll have to watch that. Anyways, if you like action, I totally suggest renting Death Race, it was really good, at least in my opinion.

Also, I figured out how to send pictures from my phone to my e-mail, which I found really cool. Ha, I’m horrible with electronics. Anyways, I found that cool, and thought I should blog about it.

That’s about it for now.

Damnit, this woman must be mentally handicap or something. She has to be. Everyone on the planet knows how to take a God-damned photograph. “Okay, I just, I’m not sure. Do I just..?” Jesus, Mary, and Joseph, click the button on the top right, she ought to know that- everyone does. It’s only been in the same place since the beginning of time. Matilda just needs to stop blabbering about where the button is and smile for the damn picture- the woman is bound to get it right. Well there it goes and we weren’t even smiling. Oh well, it’s not worth the hassle for another photo- several more minutes freezing our asses off on a bench in our swim-suits. Guess we should have taken the picture before our swim in the river. I’ll keep that in mind for next time.

So I got up as usual, and got ready and whatnot. Took Dylan to school and then went to school myself. Creative Writing I decided I don’t like so far, Pre-Calc- OH SHIT, I have a Pre-Calc test tomorrow, oh well. Christian Lifestyles was fun…I learned about my personality through my handwriting and drawings…I am half honest, very thourough, and have decent self-esteem. Then I found out that I am apparently, a non-conformist, self-centered, somewhat confrontational, interested in sex, very trusting and creative, but horrible at mechanics and poor social skills. Yeah, I thought that was somewhat interesting. I mean, I don’t know if it’s all true, but whatever, still cool. I decided I also like Pyschology today, and I’m not a fan of Econ. Oh, and at lunch, I got to eat the lunch Albert made me for the day. On the brown paper bag, it said “TO: KATIE <3 FROM: ALBERT” with flowers on the side and a story on the back. In my lunch, there was a PB&J, Cranberry Juice, yogurt, 3 carmel candies, fruit roll-up sorta thing, fruit by the foot, apples, a napkin with a note on it, a note, and I think that was it. I got full pretty fast though, because I had Cheerios for breakfast, I think. Who knows. After school, I went to tutor in the library, but no one came for help, so I just chilled with Katie Petnic, Hayley Loberg and Heather Murphy. And now I’m home, la-ti-da. Tomorrow is Friday, and then the weekend, ahwe(:

So I just realized I have yet to get paid for my blog. I mean, I was suppose to get paid some time ago. Oh well, it doesn’t really bother me. I actually kind of enjoy talking about my day in my blog. It’s like a personal diary sorta thing on the internet that anyone could read. Hell, I could tons of stalkers by now. I mean, I don’t, but I could…maybe. Haha. Well lets see, what did I do today that may interest my loyal readers :pp

Oh, this is good. I left a ton of reminders on Alberts phone that its our “4 month anniversary”, telling him to make me breakfast, bring me lunch, take me to a movie, take me to dinner, compliment my hair, and so on and so forth. The best was when I was sitting in Pyschology and I get a text, “You have pretty hair :D. Haha, I had forgotten I left all those reminds, it made me laugh a wee bit. Another thing that sort of made my day was when Albert told me he had sent a text to his mom on accident, rather than me. “Morning babe! MWA.” I actually started laughing out loud when I read that in Economics last period of the day. How awkward is that.

Then I took Reina home after school, and on the way, we stopped at In-n-Out because she had the urge to eat, as usual. That was a rather fun experience.

Ah, well not I’m off to pick Albert up and possibly go to Coldstone, Hallelujah. Is that how you spell it? Hm, I wonder